Oakville Zen Meditation
What is your problem? or dealing with our negativities
“Problem” means that you are dwelling on an event, a situation or a person that is perceived negatively
meaning generating a negative emotional response such as pain, anger, regret, etc..
Problems are small, gigantic, last a few min., few hours, a few years or forever. They can be solved rapidly, or never.
What is making someone or something a problem and its related suffering?
An event, situation, circumstance, or person may become an issue if our ego-driven mind decides to perceive them as a serious problem with its potential negative consequences such as suffering.
Subconsciously, our ego-driven mind has a strange affinity or attachment not only to pleasure but also to our problem-related negativities since they give it an identity , a "raison d'etre" and a task to deal with.
This is normal and insane at the same time.
The different ways to deal with a problem:
In theory, the option of denying the problem or its consequences is counter-productive if not impossible.
So, regardless of how negatively we perceive things, events, and people; we need to deal with this problem constructively at 2 levels: emotional , then rational that is cognitive.
Firstly: dealing with our emotional mind is the most important step.
Controlling our reactive emotional pain is far more important than dealing directly with the so-called problem since, if your mind is too emotional, it will not be able to deal effectively with the issues. In fact, this emotional pain may aggravate the situation. This is a vicious circle.
Learning to be aware of our feelings one by one in a mindful non judgmental way, and to accept them is the only way to deal with our negativities. Paying attention to the current moment and the pain associated with it will help 1) to control its frequency, duration, and intensity, and 2) then to let it go.
The practice of regular daily meditation to tame our mind is very useful in this regard.
Secondly dealing with the “problem rationally that is cognitively.
Is there a real problem or is it a perception? , or an interpretation?
If it is a perception / interpretation you will deal with it as a mind issue described previously.
If there is a real problem use your mental algorithms
Do I have any control of it? YES or NO
What are the solutions if any.
No solution = no problem, just fact of life.
Solution = go for it alone or with others,
Final thoughts:
That a real problem exists or nor is not the most crucial issue to deal with.
Rather, its emotional negative reactions, always present at various degrees, must be dealt in a mindful way that is:
> Watching our restless emotional mind in difficult situations thru ongoing awareness,
> Then accepting our feelings as they are. Do not be your own psychiatrist / psychoanalyst.
Therefore, pain is unavoidable but suffering is optional.
This is the only way to effectively tackle most of our problems and their related negativities.
